The Shocking Tuna Salad

28 Dec

So I just finished eating a tuna salad sandwich. Tuna salad happens to be one of my favorite foods and is relatively easy to make. Also, I make the world’s best tuna salad, and no one else has ever topped mine in the history of mankind, at least when it comes to my own taste buds.

Imagine my surprise and delight to walk into the kitchen today to discover my mother had made a regular salad and a tuna salad. Not only that, the regular salad even had cheese in it. Cheese! I love cheese!

Refocusing, I naturally made myself a tuna salad sandwich. I couldn’t resist it.

Halfway through the sandwich, I bit into something that tasted odd. Mushy, sweet. Too sweet to be an onion.

I had to remove it, because I couldn’t continue eating it. Maybe it was just a mishap, I told myself- a really sweet onion after all.

Then it happened again. At this point, I was confused, and the more I chewed and tasted, the more I was confused. Again, a removal, an avoidance.

I examined the uneaten piece of sweetness from the tuna salad, and it looked remarkably like pineapple. Still unsure, I had to actually ask my mother about this.

She revealed to me that it was apple.


Apples in tuna salad.

Somehow I, the mega-awesome chef master-of-tuna-salad, was tricked into eating tuna salad made with apples.

Hopefully the gods of the kitchen will forgive my offenses in doing so. Apples in tuna salad, I can avow whole-heartedly, are not my thing. Maybe others have had better experiences with this.

Also, many people, including my own mother, seem to really love having eggs in their tuna salad. I’m not a huge fan of boiled eggs, much less boiled eggs in tuna salad, so it’s strange to have the combination of apples and eggs together with onions, bell pepper, and fish. I’m not sure my brain can really comprehend what just happened in my mouth earlier, especially since I was eating mustard on my sandwich.



Posted by on December 28, 2010 in food


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6 responses to “The Shocking Tuna Salad

  1. The Onyx Plate

    December 28, 2010 at 8:30 pm

    Oh this made me laugh! My mom is always throwing things in various dishes. Why can’t they leave good southern classics in their original form? I’m curious…what is in your tuna salad?

    • enamouredslave

      December 29, 2010 at 12:01 am

      Oh, fear not; I shall post the great goodness of my tuna salad in a future blog. I may have done it in a past blog, but it’s about time that I start figuring out all my measurements, taking photos, and generally making the entries read-worthy.

      Needless to say, neither apples nor pineapples find their way into my tuna salad.

  2. gigi

    December 29, 2010 at 9:03 am

    So sorry. There was no pineapple in the tuna salad, just apple. Also, I put apple in potato salad sometimes. I admit, your tuna salad is the very best tuna salad that I have ever eaten… So why won’t you tell me your secret recipe as, after all, I am your mom!!!

    • enamouredslave

      December 30, 2010 at 7:59 pm

      Haha, it’s okay, Mom, don’t worry about it. Maybe I’ll write out the recipe when I can figure out all the actual ingredients I use.

  3. The Onyx Plate

    December 29, 2010 at 2:15 pm

    Now wait…if Mom can’t even get a recipe, then I, relatively a stranger, have no chance… 🙂


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